Starting university is an exciting and transformative phase of life. It’s a time when you embark on a journey of self-discovery, academic growth, and the opportunity to make lifelong friends. However, for many students, it can also be a period marked by feelings of loneliness and isolation.
Loneliness at university is not uncommon, and it can affect students from all walks of life. The transition from high school or home life to a new and often unfamiliar environment can be challenging.Â
Why do I feel so lonely at university?
University life, often considered a time of boundless social interaction and vibrant camaraderie, can ironically be a period marked by profound loneliness for many students. Several factors contribute to the prevalence of loneliness on university campuses:
- Transition and change: The shift from high school or home life to university is a significant transition. Students often leave behind familiar surroundings, friends, and support networks. Adjusting to this new environment can be challenging and lonely.
- Academic pressure: University coursework can be demanding and time-consuming. The pressure to excel academically can lead to isolation as students spend long hours studying or working on assignments.
- Diversity and size: Universities are often large and diverse, which can make it difficult to find like-minded individuals or form close-knit communities. The sheer size of some campuses can make students feel lost in the crowd.
- Competitive atmosphere: The competitive nature of university can foster a sense of individualism, making it challenging for students to reach out to others for fear of appearing vulnerable or less accomplished.
- Difficulty making new friends: University life can sometimes present challenges when it comes to making new friends. Whether due to social anxiety, a lack of common interests, or other factors, difficulty in forming new connections can contribute significantly to feelings of loneliness among students.
- Expectations vs. reality: Unrealistic expectations about the social scene at university, fueled by media or societal portrayals, can lead to disappointment when the actual experience doesn’t align.
While loneliness is a common experience in university, it’s essential to recognize that it is not insurmountable. Universities typically offer support services, clubs, and social events to help students combat loneliness. Additionally, seeking professional help when needed can be effective strategies for coping with and overcoming the pervasive loneliness that can accompany the university journey.Â
What to do if you feel lonely at university?
If you’re feeling lonely at university, here are some strategies to consider:
Active ways to meet people
- Reach out: Don’t be afraid to reach out to people. Strike up conversations with classmates, dorm mates, or neighbours. Many others may be feeling lonely too and would welcome a friendly chat.
- Join clubs and organisations: Universities offer a wide range of clubs and organisations catering to various interests. Joining one or more of these groups can be an excellent way to meet people who share your passions.
- Attend social events: Participate in university-sponsored social events, such as orientation parties, workshops, and themed gatherings. These occasions provide opportunities to connect with fellow students.
- Study groups: Form or join study groups for your courses. Collaborating with peers not only enhances your academic performance but can also lead to meaningful friendships.
- Volunteer: Engaging in volunteer work on or off-campus can provide a sense of purpose and introduce you to new people.
- Online communities: In the digital age, online communities can be a valuable resource. Join university-related social media groups or forums where students share experiences and offer support.
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Ways to take care of your mental health
- Self-care: Take care of your physical and mental well-being. Eat healthily, get regular exercise, and ensure you’re getting enough sleep. A healthy body and mind are better equipped to cope with loneliness.
- Practice self-compassion: Discover the concept of self-compassion by exploring the wealth of available resources. A notable recommendation is to delve into the work of Kristin Neff, a prominent figure in the field of self-compassion, and explore the resources she has to offer.
- Practice mindfulness: To gain a deeper insight into your thoughts and combat loneliness, mindfulness serves as a valuable tool for enhancing self-awareness. Beyond enhancing self-understanding, mindfulness practice can also help you cultivate the ability to be fully present in the moment, reducing the tendency to dwell on the past or worry about the future.
- Talk to someone: If you’re feeling lonely, don’t keep it to yourself. Talk to a trusted friend, family member, or therapist about your feelings. Sometimes, sharing your emotions can provide relief and insight.
Keep in mind that your experience of loneliness at university is shared by many, and you are not alone in this. If you find that you require additional support, please know that we are here to assist you. Our team is experienced in working with students, and we are eager to collaborate with you on your journey. Don’t hesitate to reach out to Edinburgh Therapy Service and take that initial step towards enriching your academic and personal life.
Further reading
Your student counsellor in Edinburgh
Edinburgh Therapy Service is a counseling practice based in Edinburgh offering student counselling services. We have a strong passion for working with students and we bring a wealth of knowledge in understanding the unique challenges you may face during your academic pursuits.
Our service specialize in cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), compassion-focused therapy (CFT) and minfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT) for a variety of issues. Whether you’re seeking student counselling in person here in Edinburgh or prefer online sessions, we are here to support you. Contact us today!